Skip to content

SUCCESS

March 20, 2012

“You’ve succesfully broken a penis with all that jambing and crushing.”

When I receive comments like this I feel that people don’t quite read my reviews or just look at the pictures and videos, which is fine.  I was well aware of what I was doing and was showing a point that the sleeve was near impossible to put on a dildo let alone a penis. Or perhaps I really did just want to break a penis.

Congrats to me and a warning

March 15, 2012

First off I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who congratulated me on the birth of my baby boy. If you’re curious he was born February 29th, 2012. The story really isn’t important and I don’t think anyone who’s here to read sex toy reviews or other adultish content really cares. Not to mention it would be really odd and weird to post anything more than that here on this blog. So let’s leave it at congratulations and get on with my friendly warning.

I feel that pregnancy, post-pregnancy, and feelings about myself and body are all topics that I can write about here. Not “Oh my god Tina I just want donuts and parenthood is such a drag since I can’t slag off 24/7.” type posts but posts about pregnancy sex (which I have written about), changes with sex after pregnancy, changes with my body and self in a sexual sense, along with anything else that may have a prengnacy/parenthood ring to it that I can think of.

Honestly I’m not sure if they would help anyone but it’s my site and I can’t really discuss these things openly elsewhere. Not to mention I would like to start posting a little more content that isn’t sex toy review related. So I thought I’d give you a friendly warning that there may be an influx of these types of posts.

SHABLAM!

Pleasurists 170

February 28, 2012

Courtesy of the bedroom blogger*Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. If you like what you see and want more of it be sure to follow the RSS Feed and Twitter for updates.

Did you miss Pleasurists 169? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists 171? Be sure to read the submission guidelines and then use the submission form to submit before Sunday March 4th @ 11:59pm Pacific.

*Pleasurists recently started accepting photo submissions for the art at the top of editions! For more information click here.

Want a shiny new toy? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Editor

Scarlet Lotus

On to the reviews:

Read more…

Surprise Guests

February 24, 2012

If your house were to suddenly receive surprise guests RIGHT NOW without the chance to hide or clean anything up would your house be safe? Is there anything laying around that would embarrass you or make for unpleasent tension? Would you be okay or is your house pretty safe?

This question is inspired by an episode of Charmed that Maverick and I were watching where Paige takes news reporters around their house to show them they have nothing to hide. Of course they go into the attic where she suddenly remembers and sees the Book of Shadows, something she stands in front of to hide from view as to not expose their secret of being witches.

There have been times where I’ve had an erotica book sitting on the shelf or a dildo out when my family has decided to stop by. Luckily I’ve always managed to get the toys out of view, but sometimes I forget about the books. My Dad I don’t think has ever noticed, save for one time when I had some knee-high boots with 5″ heels sitting on the kitchen table. Granted they were for my Halloween costume it still created some unpleasent tension because he was of the mindset that something was going on.

Because of our close calls Maverick requested that I move all the porn and erotica novels to our bedroom. This wasn’t a big deal and worked fine at first, until my little sister (she’s nearly 18) started coming over. Sometime’s she’d go upstairs and browse around my closet (where I had the books and porn on the shelves) looking for clothes or the cats or god knows what.

Due to her age you think she’d understand, but it kind of makes things a bit awkward when she comments that she KNOWS my turned around DVDs cases are porn. Of course I’ve never lied and told her that yes they were porn and with as many comments she’s made she was welcome to borrow some if she wanted.  From our awkward sex talk (someone had to have it with her) I know she’s not interested in sex right now, but it’s made me wonder if I should buy her a gift card to a sex toy shop or something due to her prior comments about our porn that I mentioned. That’s another story though.

Maverick has a different view because we’ve scarred her for life with the times I’ve lent her my DSLR camera that had photos of me naked on it, accidental porn links being sent to her on messenger due to a copypasta error, and things like that. I feel a bit bad for her really.

This all has a point, I promise.

Due to the close calls with my family, noticing that my sister is a bit nosy, and talk about having people come over and possibly house sitting or checking on our animals when we decide to go somewhere, we’ve decided that our house isn’t that safe from visitors who’d tour the whole house.

While we’re not ashamed of our sex lives or the fact that I’m a sex toy reviewer, we don’t care to deal with the awkwardness of people knowing everything we have. Because of this we’ve purchased a trunk, similar to the rolling ones you see at Walmart and Target for college dorms, for lockable storage. I’m not sure if you would look at it and think “Oh my god horde of sex toys” or not, but it creates a peace of mind that people won’t be touching my things and thus makes it so my house is safe for any random house tours.

So how about your house?

 

Review: Mood Naughty Plug

February 21, 2012

Back in 2009 I listened to a fellow reviewer rave on and on about the Bootie plug and how it was awesome for everyday wear due to the base of the plug being slightly curved, long, and skinny so that it fit between the butt cheeks perfectly. Eventually I tried it out for myself and loved it, however I have no idea what happened to that plug; perhaps I swapped it with someone or something. So when I saw that PinkCherry.com had a similar styled plug I decided it was a must try.

The Mood Naughty Plug features a similar bottom and the best way to describe it is a large stretched out open C shaped curve. It’s also slim so that it doesn’t pry your butt cheeks apart during wear, instead it allows for nearly invisible wear.

I wish I could say there is something extremely special about this plug aside from the base, but I can’t. It’s a butt plug made of medical grade silicone so it is Phthalate free, hypoallergenic, non-porous and can be sterilized to share with the world.

My Mood Naughty Plug is the large version which gives you around 4.5” of insertable length and 1.25” diameter at its largest point, it’s tapered after all. I mention that 1.25” of the insertable length is for the neck and can’t really be felt. I feel that it’s a bit long and jips you of the experience. Not to mention that I found that my body seemed to put the neck out and pull it back in. This could have been fun if it had any real feeling, but it was just too small for me. A bad analogy would pursing your lips slightly and sucking on a pencil like you’re studding for a test.  You feel it but you don’t.

This plug is good for beginners due to its size. It’s small enough that insertion with water based lubricant should be comfortable and large enough that it provides a “something in me” sensation without being uncomfortable. The largest point as I mentioned is 1.25” around. This is right at the very end of the taper which immediately drops off to the neck part of the toy. I recommend it more than other plugs of smaller size due to open C-shaped bottom, which I’ve made a huge point to drill into your skulls over and over.

However if you’re a more experienced anal player and something that fills you a bit more, this isn’t for you. If you want something that only you know is in for the hotness factor then go for it. As for myself I found it a nice change of size and something I’d use again for those days I want to feel naughty and walk around comfortably in public.

Rating: 
PinkCherry Sex Toys

Review: LELO Soraya

February 1, 2012

LELO has always been one of my favorite brands for the aesthetically pleasing design of their toys. However their high price tag has never meant the product will work for me and often times it’s more in the MISS field than anything. This doesn’t stop me from wanting to test out some of their new toys when I get the chance.

The LELO Soraya is a rabbit style vibrator in LELOs semi-new Insignia line. I know that I overuse the word luxurious, but that’s really the only way to describe the look of this toy aside from high end and so expensive looking that you’d need to sell your soul to get a hold of it.

My Soraya is hot pink and gold. At first I mistook the gold plates on the side for metal but they are just metallic plastic. Soraya’s body features an ABS core wrapped in a smooth silicone; this makes it quite rigid with no give. The actual clitoral stimulator is semi-flexible so that you can adjust it a little to the right position. Unlike most rabbits the actual stimulator is just an oblong bulb and not a funny animal shape in an attempt to be cute; which I can appreciate.

With two motors you can use the shaft and clitorous stimulator independently, together, or simply enjoy the combination of the two with patterned vibrations.  LELO doesn’t describe or tell you about the patterns so here’s my best description:

  • Steady vibrations in both the shaft and clitorous stimulator
  • Steady vibrations in just the clitorous stimulator
  • Steady vibrations in just the shaft
  • Alternating/Back and forth pulse vibration between the shaft and clitorous stimulator
  • Both the clitoral stimulator and shaft pulsate at the same time
  • Escalating wave between the clitorous stimulator that moves to the shaft.
  • Escalating wave between the clitorous stimulator and shaft that has some sort of pulse in it
  • LELO’s song – some kind of chaos type that pulses, vibrates, and erratic switches between the clitoral stimulator and shaft. It seriously sounds like a song. The video below is for the LELO Siri which has the same song.

Now for a rechargeable vibrator I found that the vibrations on the Soraya were pretty damn strong. Sure they are not Hitachi strong, but they are the strongest I’ve felt in a while for a vibrator. Enough that they conquered my clit-o-steel.

Really I’m at a loss of what to compare their strength with, but I can tell you that unlike some of my other toys their strength kept the same rumbly feeling instead of moving to a buzzy numb vibration. I found that the clitoral stimulator seemed to be stronger in terms of strength than the shaft as well.

Complaint wise I only have a few issues with this toy.

Number one: The clitoral stimulator doesn’t provide a lot of pressure. While flexibility is nice I would have liked a bit more rigidness so that I didn’t have to push myself into it.

Number two: It is a bitch to clean. You would think that not only being made of silicone and plastic AND being waterproof this would be easy. However the plastic plates that give this a beautiful design have a tiny gap between their edge and the start of the silicone making it a hoarder of gunk and a perfect breeding ground for bacteria. I like my toys to be squeaky clean so I used a flat headed toothpick to get in and out of the crannies, but I shouldn’t have had to resort to such measures.

Two complaints for a whole toy? Not too bad. This is one LELO product that I would suggest paying the price tag on if you want a rabbit style vibrator. It’s modern looking, waterproof, rechargeable, quiet even at its highest settings and strong enough to get you off. What more could you ask for?

 

If you’re confused on how it can be rechargeable AND waterproof there is a little silicone ‘door’ where you shove the charger into. When you take it out it closes again. Simple and easy.

Rating: 

Use the code ONS15 at checkout for 15% off your purchase!

Pleasurists 166

January 30, 2012

Crystal Delights Crystal Twist by Epiphora

Courtesy of Epiphora*Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. If you like what you see and want more of it be sure to follow the RSS Feed and Twitter for updates.

Did you miss Pleasurists 165? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists 167? Be sure to read the submission guidelines and then use the submission form to submit before Sunday February 5th @ 11:59pm Pacific.

*Pleasurists recently started accepting photo submissions for the art at the top of editions! For more information click here.

Want a shiny new toy? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Read more…

%d bloggers like this: